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Before your little one arrived, you probably had a vision of what life with a baby would be like – but the reality might be quite different. While they can fill your world with joy, babies can also take a lot out of their parents. Everything is unknown and there can be an overwhelming array of advice, so it’s not surprising there are some stressed out moms and dads. But there are no perfect parents, and as time goes by you’ll start to gain confidence and trust your instincts when it comes to caring for your baby. You’re not alone. It’s a good idea to talk to other parents – they have been through those early days, and their experiences may reassure you that you can trust your own way too.

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We asked some real parents how they coped during those early days.

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1.- Charlie, dad of two. 

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“There is a lot of guidance out there on ‘how to parent’, but I think it’s ultimately what works for you and the kids – as long as they’re safe and healthy, it shouldn’t matter what others think” 

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2.- Sally, mom of two. 

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“If all else fails, I have a good cry. It’s not a sign of weakness or that I’sometimes and it helps me to have a bit of a release and move on” 

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3.- Andy, dad of one. 

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“It’s natural to sometimes feel alone as parents, so try to support each other. Each night, we share our moments of the day, learning from them to make things better next time”

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4.- Garen, dad of two. 

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“If you're going through a hard time with your baby – whether it’s feeding problems, colic, sleepless nights – try to remember it’s just a phase, and you’re there to help them through it with as much patience and understanding as you can muster!”

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5. Chris, dad of one.

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“Newborn babies sleep a lot – but are also constantly waking up. There’s a good chance they’re hungry, but if it’s not that and they’re still struggling to sleep, try white noise. It’s remarkably soothing, for the baby and the parents!” 

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6.- Carolyn, mom of three.

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“After a day home alone with my baby, bathtime can sometimes feel like a big hurdle. To help me deal with it, I put on my favourite song – really loudly – and jump around the house. It gives me an energy boost and makes me smile."

We all know that vegetables are an essential part of a healthy diet, but telling kids that carrots are good for their eyes doesn't always make the food go down faster. Fortunately, there are several fun and effective strategies for making veggies more appealing to picky eaters. It's been said that a child will likely develop their eating habits by 10 years old. This makes it even more critical that eating more veggies is not just something they do once in awhile, but that it's a habit.

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These four ideas can absolutely pave the way for new habits to be built. After all, the most important thing we can teach our kids is to have healthy habits, and this will set them up for life-long health.

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1. Improving Availability

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Including more fruits and vegetables in daily meals is an important step if you want to get your kids used to eating healthy. If they can expect vegetables at every meal, it's harder to avoid them. Serving vegetables and salads consistently will help them seem more natural. To make healthy snacks accessible, keep containers of carrot sticks, celery, snow peas and other vegetables handy. This is a good way to get kids to help themselves and build healthy habits. We always have carrots pre-washed and cut, cucumbers sliced, and broccoli chopped into bite size pieces. This makes it easy for kids to reach in the fridge and grab a quick sack without having to prep anything.

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2. Going Undercover

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If you can't get your kids to eat veggie-based dishes and sides, you can always sneak healthy items into their favorite foods. At breakfast, add sautéed vegetables to scrambled eggs or omelets. It's easy to hide zucchini in a pot of pasta sauce. Spinach and carrots are great in lasagna.

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Mashed sweet potatoes, lentils, and black beans can be added saucy dishes, and they work well in vegetarian burgers. Even the pickiest eater won't be able to resist macaroni and cheese spiked with tomatoes and red peppers. Combining veggies with foods they already know and like have a much higher acceptability for kids.

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3. Involving Kids

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Getting children involved in cooking is a great way to help them see vegetables differently. If kids have the option to choose a vegetable for dinner or help prepare it, they're more likely to enjoy the experience. Starting a backyard garden is another way to get youngsters into vegetables. Planting seeds, watching plants grow and picking vegetables for dinner can get kids excited about veggies. String beans, lettuce, and radishes grow quickly and are rewarding crops. Kids can also be in charge of making their own lunches and deciding what snacks they want to eat!

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4. Making Vegetables Appealing

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Let's face it. Steamed spinach makes a bad impression on finicky eaters. Making vegetables look good is the most important part of the battle. It's hard to get kids to try foods that don't look tasty. Decorating broccoli florets with star-shaped cheese slices or fruit can help make this unpopular vegetable more appealing.

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Sometimes, the way vegetables are cut can have a big effect. Carrots and cucumbers can become cute flowers if you make a few V-shaped cuts before they're sliced. This four-pronged strategy is sure to get your kids loading up their forks with piles of healthy vegetables. You can worry about getting them interested in Brussels sprouts and Swiss chard later.

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Responding to Talking Back, Swearing, Defiance and Other Rude Behaviors By Amy Morin, LCSW

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Whether your child rolls her eyes or she says, "Whatever Mom!" when you tell her to do something, occasional mild disrespect can be common. On the more serious end of the spectrum, disrespectful children call people names, disregard the rules, and become physically aggressive. No matter where your child falls on the spectrum, it's important to address disrespectful behavior fast. A 2015 study conducted by researchers at the University of Virginia found that disrespectful children become rude adults.

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Don't excuse disrespect by saying things like, "Well kids will be kids." Excuses allow your child's rude behavior to continue. Instead, step in and teach your child socially appropriate ways to interact, deal with frustration, and communicate effectively. Here are the most effective discipline techniques to stop disrespectful children from turning into disrespectful adults:

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1. Ignore Attention Seeking Behavior

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It may seem like ignoring minor disrespect is the same as allowing your child to get away with it. But selective ignoring can be one of the most effective negative consequences. Ignoring doesn't mean letting your child get away with being mean, however. Instead, it's about refusing to give your child attention when he's acting obnoxious. If you tell your child to clean his room, and he rolls his eyes, don't engage in a lengthy argument over his disrespectful behavior. Each minute you spend in a power struggle is 60 seconds he'll put off cleaning his room.

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Address the issue at a later time when both of you are calm. Say something like, "Earlier today when I told you to clean your room, you rolled your eyes. Are you aware that you do that when you're mad?" Talk about the potential consequences of disrespect. Ask, "Do you think that you roll your eyes when your friend says something you don't like?" Engage in a discussion about how other people feel when they witness rude behavior.

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Explain the natural consequences for disrespectful behavior such as, “Disrespectful children often have trouble making friends."

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2. Grandma’s Rule of Discipline

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Grandma’s rule of discipline is a simple but effective way to get your child to comply. Instead of telling your child what he can't do, tell him when he can earn a privilege. Say something such as, “When you lower your voice and talk calmly, I’ll answer you,” or “I’ll help you pick up the toys when you stop being bossy.” Teach your child that polite and kind behavior will lead to positive results.

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3. Provide a Single Warning

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Use an, “if…then,” statement to warn your child what will happen if the behavior doesn’t change. Say, “If you don’t stop interrupting when I’m on the phone then you’ll need to go to your room.” This gives your child an opportunity to change his behavior around. Just make sure you're fully prepared to follow through with a negative consequence if he doesn't comply. Avoid repeating your warnings over and over again. Otherwise, you'll be training your child not to listen.

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4. Provide a Negative Consequence

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Moderate or serious disrespectful behavior requires an immediate negative consequence. If your teen walks out the door after you’ve told him he can’t leave, take away his privileges. Or, if your 6-year-old screams in your face when he's angry, don't take him to the park. Time-out can be an effective negative consequence for young children. Logical consequences can be effective for older children and teens.

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5. Restitution

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If your child or teen behaves disrespectful manner, restitution may be necessary to discourage it from happening again. If he hits his brother, make him do his brother's chores. Or, if your teen breaks something out of anger, make him fix it or pay to get it fixed. Teach your child that saying, “I’m sorry,” doesn’t always fix things. Restitution will help him take responsibility for his disrespectful behavior while also working to repair the relationship.

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A Work in Progress

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When you're addressing disrespectful behavior it's normal for your child to take two steps forward and one step back. So while he may be polite and kind one day, he may struggle the next. Consistent discipline is the key to helping him make progress over the long-term. Point out his good behavior when you see it. And when he's having a bad day, consider his disrespectful behavior is a sign that he needs more practice. Most importantly, be a good role model. Whether you're frustrated with the service you receive at a restaurant or you're angry at the telemarketer who interrupted your dinner, treat others with respect and your child will follow suit.

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Sources: Hafen CA, Allen JP, Schad MM, Hessel ET. Conflict with friends, relationship blindness, and the pathway to adult disagreeableness. Personality and Individual Differences. 2015;81:7-12. Ty A, Mitchell DG, Finger E. Making amends: Neural systems supporting donation decisions prompting guilt and restitution. Personality and Individual Differences. 2017;107:28-36

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